A Dialogue with Abba Arsenius on Losing Everything but Christ “Whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ.” — Philippians 3:7 The disciple found Arsenius sitting outside his cell. There was nothing before him. No book. No work. No food. Only his hands resting upon his knees and the desert stretching beyond him. The disciple stood nearby. Arsenius did not look up. Disciple: Father, I have lost much. Arsenius: Not enough. The disciple was silent. The words wo

A Dialogue with St. Charbel on the Solitude Where Only God Remains “My heart and my flesh have rejoiced in the living God.” — Psalm 83:3 (LXX) The disciple found Charbel outside the hermitage before dawn. The saint was gathering fallen branches. Disciple: Father, may I ask you something? Charbel: Ask. Disciple: When the abbot permitted you to come here, he warned the brothers not to think of it as a reward. Charbel: Yes. Disciple: Why? Charbel picked up another branch. Charbe

A dialogue with Abba Arsenius on hiddenness, usefulness, and the one thing needful “Arsenius, flee from men, and you will be saved.” — The Sayings of the Desert Fathers The disciple came to Arsenius after sunset. The old man was sitting outside his cell. The disciple bowed and remained standing. After a long while Arsenius said: ARSENIUS: Why have you come? DISCIPLE: Because I do not know what I am supposed to become. Arsenius looked toward the desert. ARSENIUS: Who told you

An elder and a disciple in the hour when words fail “Keep thy mind in hell, and despair not.” The disciple came to the elder before dawn. He had not slept. For many months he had carried questions with him into prayer, believing that if he remained patient enough an answer would eventually come. But the questions had not been answered. They had simply grown tired. Now even the words with which he had once spoken to God seemed exhausted. He sat before the elder. For a long tim

A Dialogue for the Feast of Saint Silouan the Athonite “My soul yearns after the Lord, and I seek Him in tears.” — Saint Silouan the Athonite The disciple came to the elder before dawn. He had not slept. For many months he had prayed that God would make the path clear. Instead, one door after another had closed. Things that once seemed certain had become uncertain. Names by which he had known himself no longer seemed able to hold him. Even good desires had become painful beca

A Dialogue with Abba Arsenius on Formation, Silence, and Freedom The disciple came to the old man late in the afternoon. Arsenius was sitting outside his cell, mending a worn basket. The disciple bowed and waited. The old man did not look up. At last the disciple spoke. Disciple: Father, I have been waiting for my life to begin. Arsenius stopped working. Arsenius: Where have you been living? Disciple: That is not what I mean. I have sought God for many years. I thought by now

A Visitor Speaks with Abba Arsenius as His Life Draws to Its End “Why are you weeping, Father? Are you also afraid?” “Indeed, the fear which is mine at this hour has been with me ever since I became a monk.” — Sayings of the Desert Fathers, Abba Arsenius A brother came to see Abba Arsenius when the old man was nearing the end of his life. Word had passed quietly among the brothers that Arsenius had become very weak. The man who had once stood in the palace of the emperor now

A Dialogue Between a Disciple and St. Arsenius “Be silent, and your heart will learn that every loss offered to God becomes a wider place for His love.” The disciple came to the old man while the evening light still rested upon the stones of the desert. He bowed and remained silent for a long while. At last Arsenius looked upon him. “What troubles your heart?” The disciple hesitated. “Father, I desired silence, and God has granted it.” Arsenius smiled gently. “And yet you hav

A Dialogue Between St. Charbel and a Disciple on the Life of a Hermit “Go into your cell, and your cell will teach you everything.” — Apophthegmata Patrum The disciple approached the old hermit as evening settled over the mountains. The cedars stood motionless against the fading sky, and from within the little stone cell came only silence. “Father,” he said softly, “many speak of the beauty of the hermit’s life. They imagine peace, freedom, and an intimacy with God that canno

A Dialogue with St. Isaac the Syrian Disciple: Father, there is something I cannot understand. You spend so much time laying the foundation before speaking of the mysteries of divine love. You return again and again to humility, silence, repentance, watchfulness, tears, and detachment. You speak fiercely about letting go of attachments, about guarding the heart, about fleeing whatever cools our love for God. Some who hear you find this severe. They wonder why you cannot simpl