PHILOKALIA MINISTRIES

On the Difference Between the Loss of Self and the Loss of Illusion “I sat alone because Thou hadst filled me with indignation.” — Book of Jeremiah 15:17 There is a way of speaking about “disappearing” that is dangerous, because it easily collapses into something else entirely. One imagines silence, withdrawal, the refusal to assert oneself, and assumes this is the same as vanishing. But the Fathers, and even the deeper currents of psychoanalytic thought, would resist such a

When the Soul Stands Exposed Before God “It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God.” Hebrews 10:31 ___________ “It was not an enemy that insulted me; that I could have borne… But it was you, my companion, my friend.” Psalm 55 Psalm 35 does not speak in abstractions. It bleeds. It trembles with the bewilderment of a heart that loved and was answered with accusation. It gives voice to the humiliation of being misread, misrepresented, quietly judged, and pub

From Compunction to Surrender in the Fire of Divine Eros “We love because He first loved us.” 1 John 4:19 There is a compunction that still circles the self. Tears can be shed that are secretly about my failure. My weakness. My fall. My loss of image. Even repentance can become a mirror in which I stare at myself. The fathers warn us that the ego is subtle. It will clothe itself even in sackcloth. The sorrow that leads to life does not end in self absorption. It breaks the he