PHILOKALIA MINISTRIES

St. John the Baptist and the Freedom of a Hidden Life “He must increase, but I must decrease.” — John 3:30 There are few saints whose birth the Church celebrates. We celebrate the birth of St. John the Baptist because from the beginning his life was ordered toward a single purpose: to prepare a place for Christ. John’s greatness did not consist in what he accomplished. It did not consist in the crowds that gathered around him, the power of his preaching, or even the austerity

Learning to Remain Before What Still Calls to Us “My soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen for the morning.” — Psalm 130:6 There are certain lights that continue to burn in our lives long after we can no longer walk toward them. A monastery where one once felt at home. A work that gave shape to our days. Friendships that remain dear to us but have changed. Strength that has faded. Possibilities that once seemed near and now seem uncertain. Ways of living that still stir

On Waiting Between What Was and What May Never Be “The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.” — Job 1:21 There are days when I do not feel like holding onto any identity at all. I have spent much of my life straining toward things that seemed beautiful and holy. Priesthood, religious life, study, prayer, ascetic labor, teaching, writing, spiritual friendship. There was always the sense that one could become something more faithful, more wort

Amma Syncletica and the Disciple Who Could No Longer Do What She Once Did A sister came to Amma Syncletica and said: “Mother, my body has become my prison. I cannot walk as I once did. I tire quickly. Pain accompanies me day and night. My memory fails me. I cannot pray with the fervor I had in my youth. I have become useless, and a great sadness has come upon me.” The Amma looked at her for a long while and said: “Who told you that your value was in your strength?” The sister

There comes a point in life when a man realizes he is tired. Not depressed. Not hopeless. Not wishing for death. Simply tired. Tired in his mind, tired in his body, tired in his soul. He looks back and sees years of striving. Years of carrying responsibilities, meeting expectations, building projects, teaching, caring for others, solving problems, remaining accessible, pushing himself forward through discipline and determination. Much of it was good. Much of it served others.