PHILOKALIA MINISTRIES

There comes a moment when truth must be entrusted to God rather than defended before men “Lord, I consent to be known without being understood. You know me. Let that be enough.” There is a strange protection in speaking indirectly. We can write about surrender, abandonment, silence, loss, obedience, the stripping away of identity. We can speak truthfully—even painfully—and yet remain partially hidden. The words reveal us. But they also veil us. It is another thing altogether

The night was long, and the disciple sat in the doorway of his small cell, hands trembling over the beads of his prayer rope. He had prayed, fasted, kept vigil, yet his heart felt like a boat unmoored on open sea. He went to the elder, whose lamp still burned though the stars were nearly gone from the sky. Disciple: Father, pray for me. I do not trust the steadiness of my own heart. I fear I may fail in what God is asking. Some days I feel strong, clear, called; other days I